i m gng to viet in like 30 mins! woohoo... first time taking such bloody early flight.. hope everything goes well

BACK BACK BACK!!!

trying hard to store the shisha

fabian clearing up our oysters

the most messed up n fucked up rm a human had ever seen(according to my unilodge mates)

WOOHOO.. exams are over..back in spore n going for vietnam soon!!... life's great!!..

ysd was a veri cock day... paul , oliver, joseph, fabian ,his gf n i went to redcliffe for seafood....WAH LAN ... the journey sibe shag... oliver suddenly cant find the bus-stop for the bus den we haf to taek train DEN take bus again!! DAMN SHAG... whole journey take a fucking 3 hrs... but lucky got take the long road or else we also wont meet this interesting ang moh...

she's 40 n sibe tok cock...i stand down there toking to my ang moh friend asking him redcliffe which food is gd den she suddenly chup in and tok cock... say she from Sydney n the chinatown got great food n how her father died n the asians being so nice to her(sibe bo link rite?) but the ang mohs here they always tok cock out of the blue one n most of the time is totally no link... lucky got her also lar or else the bus trip of 1 hr plus will be so boring lar... she says she's a descendant of Hilter's mistress n say some shit abt whale watching n how the ex-cambodian dictator kill ppl... but she realli stun me when she suddenly say her ancestors are 1st batch of convicts.. i totally stun n dunno how to respond.. but she's totally cool abt it n says she's proud n her history n stuff which is a gd thing..

DEN SUDDENLY she shout,'' shut up urself n fuck off!''.. not to me lar.. but to a cockster sitting behind n keep moaning abt our loudness but hide his face behind the newspaper(we later refer him as smeagol of Lotr coz the way he niam is damn gayish like smeagol says''my precious'')..
i damn kia alr... she out of the blue so fierce like wanna fight like dat..but end up nothing happen lar.. the guy too hum ..

TODAE WAS A SHAGGGGGGGGG DAY!!!... move out of my apartment in the wee hrs last nite n this morning i was fucking fucking late for my flight... it was a 1.55pm flight n i m still at my hse at 1245... i super scare i miss the plane.. so gan chiong until i fuck care stand in the rain n flag for cab but wait for 5 mins no cab stop!! den i fucking realise i was flagging in the bus zone!! damn!!!!! lucky juz nice i move out of the zone a cab came... den me ,jess n her 2 friends chiong up the cab.. i so gan chiong alr hor but francis knn still keep asking me for teh photos!! i literally wanna kill him...in the cab i didnt even say much stuff..too gan chiong alr... international flights need to be checked in 2hrs before!! this is probably the first time i didnt tok for like 30 mins facing 3 ppl... den reach the airport see teh board says my flight in boarding in 15 mins!!

but heng also there no queue(coz every fucking human being in my flight is boarding) n they are so nice to allow my check in...

N HERE I M BACK IN SPORE!! n juz came back from shisha wif weiliang, weiping, lewis.. i dont smoke so somehow or rather i cant reaali do it in the right manner...n wl keep referring i blow out the air as a small fart..

Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttear in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a total mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

Frkaeing amzanig huh?

So dnot say my egnlsih is vrey lan, i prupsoely do it taht way to trian yuor brian.....

cockanathan chinese names

1.Anne Chang (Mandarin)- Dirty
Anne Chin (Mandarin) -Keep quiet
2.Faye Chen (Mandarin) - Dusty
3.Carl Cheng (Hokkien) -
Buttock
4.Monica Cheng (Hokkien) -
Touching your buttocks
5.Lucy Leow (Hokkien) -
You are dead
6.Jane Tan (Mandarin) -
Frying eggs
7.Suzie Leow (Hokkien) -
Lost till death
8.Henry Mah (Mandarin) -
Hate your mum
9.Corrine Tai (Hokkien) -
Poor fellow
10.Paul Chan (Mandarin) -
Bankrupt
11.Nelson Tan (Mandarin) -
Bird laying eggs
12.Leslie Tong(Mandarin) -
Rubbish bin
13.Carmen Teng (Hokkien) -
Leg hair long
14.Connie Mah (Mandarin) -
Call your mother
15.Danny See (Hokkien) -
Squeeze you to death
16.Rosie Teng (Hokkien) -
Screws and nails
17.Pete Tsai (Hokkien) -
Nose droppings
18.Macy Koh (Cantonese) -
Never die before
19.Michael Tan (Cantonese)
- sell chicken eggs

STATS ARE DONE!!... now left chem.... been craving for the chee cheong fun wif stewed beef at city's wok since ysd...but it's so damn cold outside that i dont even wan to go out for meals...

searching for more volunteer webbies ysd... the more i rad, the more i want to go... n it's pissing irritating to jio ppl... most say see first, some say ok but later on pang seh... i tink i will juz go myself ...tinking of Uganda n some african countries... but most of them involve AIDs kids n patients leh... not tat i despise them or wat but dunno why the image of them suddenly go crazy n bite u or u got cut n touches their blood juz doesnt get out of my mind... the onli other options are animal conservation n teaching... pretty cool being teacher ya... i see the pics of the volunteers i rarely rarely see asians, in fact none... weird eh?..

STATS IS A FUCKING PAIN IN THE ASS!!... i nid lots of luck tml ...but wif the frequency of luck being shown to me in the last few yrs n the possibility of a miracle happening, the p-value of me doing well is 0.0000... therefore we muz reject the H0 and conclude that Jay Ng Jiajin is at an extremely fucked up position in this exam...

in the prison break hotel!

hey MINDY!! didnt noe u came to aussie!!! many ppl feed u everyday

the FIVE BIG THINGS in Aussie(excluding big ang moh dicks)

the leaves of the BIGBIGBIGBIGBIG pineapple

say hi to the ginger bread men!!!

YATAA!!!.. i m back from sunshine coast!! great 2 days but now i haf to fight for my survival for stats~~!!...

from the glass mountain ,ginger factory to the aussie zoo... it has been a great great trip!!...jas , kae , syl have been great company!! the only shag part was my pathetic driving on a manual car... SHIT!! i totally forget how to drive a manual car n stall the engine dunnoe how many times... dun be mistaken... i m a veri gd driver at auto though...hahahaha... F1 driver!!... oh well... guess i haf to get an auto ferrari instead of a manual one in the future , juz like kevin's dad....lolz

the first day was great.. we went to the BIG PINEAPPLE... 1 of the 5 BIG STUFF of aussie... hope i can finish all 5 before i finish optom... we meet 2 veri veri funny ang moh kids!! lulie( issit spell this way?) and oliveria... lulie keep grabbing jas' hands n refuses to leave us!! haha.. so freaking funny.. den when their parents tell them to say gdbye, they actually say gdbye to them instead!!... hahah... den there are a bunch of dumb geese chasing us... haha... lulie's dad was stunned too!! imagine a big sized ang moh carrying a baby boy running like crazy from some geese!! ...ahha...

at nite we checked into a freaking scary looking motel... like those u see in prison break whereby the fugitives went out of jail rent kind...aahhaa... but it's a hell of a new experience lar...

2nd day we went to the Australia Zoo .. didnt noe it's owned by Steve Irwin.. no wonder Bondi was choosen to do all the ads n kids exercise videos lar!.it's freaking funny when i told them tat imagine Bondi after 10 yrs become a fat ger... ! den kaeley responded,'' go n die lar... she get fat also own the zoo lor... she's steve irwin's daughter!!'' kanna stunned... see her not veri chio or wat leh.. i haf seen much chioer and cuter 9 yr old gers but she got chosen to do the exercise videos...ahaah...

went to take pics wif the koalas in the later part of the day.. kanna kan by the zookeeper ...
''can i take photos wif the thing??''
''WHAT U MEAN by the THING??!!!'' the zookeeper responded angrily... shag max...maximum paiseh... in front of them i call the koala ''the thing''... oh shit... den i go point at the ''off day koala''(yes.. the dumb koala haf off-days ..) n stroke it...
''DONT TOUCH IT!!'' this time i realli stunned... like WTF?!! scold me for wat...'' it's on off day.. u can onli take wif the other one on the tree'', she muz be fucking pissed off wif me... first referring her koala as thing den go touch a resting koala...haha.. oh wells...

we had dinner at the laska hut n we went to MT COOTA... the scenery was nice n exactly the same as the one smux camp bring us(near the jurong island one.. wat's the name ar?).. but it's god damn fucking cold n we quickly siam back to the car after a few mins...

it's a freaking long post i noe...i muz write it all down before i forget everything as i prepare my important battle against the bastard stats!!

EBA EBA AN DENAE

the super exp prata curry
the bubbles game~
the name of the cutest guy in the restaurant



went to DFO todae!! ... great day of shopping... ok i wasnt suppose to slack coz of the maths exam n sat n the chem on mon... BUT.... peter tempted me!!.. ahha... he is the Satan... end up i was spending abt 200 bucks on stuff... shit...i tink i spend more than 1000 on clothes alr since i came... n seriously tat's nuts! happy wif my shopping though... finally got my leather jacket...

went to this veri high class indian restaurant in West End wif peter after the shopping... it's pretty funny.. they gave u crayons to write on the table...we play some dumb stupid games like tic-tac-toe and ''the candles game''----the one if u cross the last candle u lose... the aussies dont play candles, they play wif bubbles and u can cross diagonally instead of juz in a straight line n can onli cross a max of 3 bubbles...

the food finally came!! it looks veri veri high class but oh crap it's juz like our singapore's mutton curry lar from those kopitiam!! wah lan.. this curry is free wif the prata one... here the curry cost 18 bucks!! siao rite... i tink the prata hse curry taste betta... the prata they call it naan bread or niaan bread.. it's made wif spring onions n stuff... still cannot compare to spore one... n it costs 8 bucks! 8 bucks for a prata... woo hoo...

n todae finally saw tiffany... damn it... but i meet her at the most suay time.. i was getting up a bus n she was walking pass the bus stop...den we glance at each other n we said hi onli!! damn.. i wanted to find her n get her no for a fucking long time alr!! but she's in KG n i at GP so we almost haf no chance to see each other!! but i cant possibly get down the bus n take her no rite.. it will look damn despo ... even get her no also no use...well.. hope i see her again soon..

tml i going sunshine coast... shit... seriously i shd be studying but kaeley ,sylvester , jas they all keep tempting me... buay tahan...ok lar.. go there study... i hope i can at least ..haha be back on thursday nite

went to KG again todae to view a few hses...wah lan leh... the hses realli cannot make it... got 1 hse i haf to walk 20 mins to reach the place form the bus stop n teh condition realli sucks!!! the room is badly maintained n still got a veri veri bad smell... but we found a pretty gd hse... it's by chance we found it... no one noes tat there is for rent n the agent cant be bothered to advertise... it's juz nice tat we met 2 ppl living in an apartment there n they told us abt it...

but i haf to live in the wulu KG area which is damn far wif the supermarket n haf to walk 15 mins to sch.. wah lan... n it's uphill somemore... i m getting freaking weak liao... walk up the hill for 10 mins i buay tahan alr... lucky i never go titiwangsa wif smux or else i becum the next KJH...

ok i tink i decided liao.. stay at river city wif the Israeli n his malaysian gf... but veri shag leh.. the first few days when i come back i haf no where to stay... hopefully can get a resolution soon... or borrow someone's place for a few days

oh yar..takeshi n kenji gng back to japan...i tot kenji wld stay as his gf is here..but apparently he's not... he tinks long-dist relationship is ok... if they are meant for each other, it will be fine... coz even if same country, it doesnt mean a couple wont break up isnt it...true... paul ,kaeley , jessmine, fabian and jerry made it too..... jerry's going back to spore.. shag...john, robbie, wendy, js all gng back spore!!! sibe sianzz...everyone is leaving.. no more friday soccer n haf to find new members for NSFF...

Owen appears to be coming back! the way he left still leaves a fucking bad taste in my mouth ...he wanted to move to RM n demanded us to sell him... son of a bitch... he's like a fucking bastard who leave his gf to try to fuck another ger and den when he failed , he wants to come back n fuck back his ex!!! if u tink we are not gd enuff for u then, u are fucking not gd enuff for us now... n u are even despo enuff to say u wan to play for the manu scumbags... OMG.. pls go n die n stay at ur newcastle shithole

the rocks n seafood dessert



i went to the Coffee Carnival by at Bowen Hills... the cafe was giving free coffee, coffee milk chake n ice-cream... n MAN it was great! they showed us the machines for roasting coffee n stuff... the aussie ppl are realli passionate abt their job.. seriously... pete n i were juz casually asking the guy abt a kind of coffee beans, den the guy juz brought us to the warehouse n show us the raw beans, teh machines n explain all the steps in coffee making..

BUT i m juz asking for the price of the beans!!! but u can realli feel their passion n their eager to show u their stuff...in my mind i was tinking .. '' this guy siao ar... work as coffee boy so garang for wat sia...'' END UP i was wrong!! nono he was not teh owner but he graduated from the COFFEE MAKING SCHOOL!!... hahah... yes.. u heard it right... coffee making training school... n it's freaking hard to get in n the tuition fees are nuts...

outside the cafe there is a freaking freaking cool bike.... THE COOLEST EVER BIKE I HAF SEEN IN MY LIFE....... THE CHOPPAZILLA......it can onli be seen in Brisbane n it's taking part in some Discovery channel documents abt the fastest n chioest bike... so far the builder onli built a few.... i juz bo liao bo liao tok to the builder den he show me his drawings, his ideas and his creations... so i ask him why he come to brissie...

''FOR THE GERS N THE WEATHER MATE...''

gers n weather??!! oh my god... brissie babes cannot make it... mayb the gd ones all at suburbs n seriously the weather isnt tat great...singapore's betta...

n i juz finished watching fantastic 4!! part 1 , nt part 2... jessica alba is crazily hot... she's literally the real human torch... mr fantastic sort of relates to me... i m like him , bloody hell always tink a lot n tink tink tink... end up too late to act.. procrastination kills... sometimes u wan sth , juz go for it!... wait for the perfect time, moment ,place doesnt always work! in fact it almost always fail....

shit i juz broke my necklace i brought from a pasar malam in GC... it cost me 35 bucks!!... n i onli wear it for less than 1 wk......i dunno why i wake up feeling strangled by the necklace so i juz put it harder than usual den it broke!! damn gay!!! mayb i m too strong.. hahahha.....it's juz the hook tat is spoilt lar actually....but not sure where i can fix back the thingy...

i nid to clear my coins so i purposely went buy my meals todae wif all coins... all the 50 ,20 , 10 and even 5 cents... went to Jackpot n paid 6 bucks worth of coins... hahah... the cashier was damn stunned!! it was at the peak period n the queue behind me was pretty long.. he was like panicking counting the coins...den i buay tahan his slow counting skills n count for him.. the next meal i went to the HK cafe n did the same thing... this time worse coz the meal is 8.80(this time is realli 1 whole lump of coins)... but the auntie was veri veri nice n she realli take her time to count the coins... will continue tml of my plan to clear the coins... next stop: SUBWAY

Vic's veri nice todae!! she juz finished her exams n seriously nothing to do so she offered to do my laundry , cook my meals, throw my rubbish n do the groceries for my whole exam period!!... WOOHOO... back to the gd old days of leeching!!! ...

exactly 11 days more n i m back to BISHAN PARK CONDO!!...CANT WAIT!!! n jialing thanx to u i m craving now for prawn mee!!! i can literally taste the soup now!!

hahah... aussie has a veri funny show call Chasers... it pokes fun at everything....... in these 2 they poke fun of the Americans..IT IS FREAKING FUNNY!! U GUYS HAF TO WATCH IT........
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HCkYfYa8ePI&mode=related&search=

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G-j15DehFUc&NR=1

(btw how u guys upload the video onto the post, i cant find the option)


p/s: if u guys cant answer the qns, pls PLS PLS dont tell anyone u are a singaporean, juz tell them u r some sri lankan chinese...

ysd after the anatomy prac, we had to stay at the room for a few mins before we can go so i tok to my ang moh classmate beside me...

''how's it going?''
''ok lar.. alot of qns are pretty tough...''
''#@$%%^ state of origin??''
''huh?sorry?''
''#@%@%^ state of origin??''
''i don't noe the answer''

#@$##@% stands for sth sth sth.... not some vulgarities btw.. i juz cant understand her aussie accent so i didnt catch it........... i tot she was asking me abt a qn in the exam--wat's the state of origin of the mesentery vein..... so i told her i dont noe coz i realli dunnoe the answer... den end up she is asking me if i watch the STATE OF ORIGIN--- the rugby tournament in Aussie... every single aussie here watches it... no wonder she looked stunned when i told her i dunnoe the answer.. cant blame me rite.. i also not an aussie.. BUT apparently john ng watches it( YES ....IT"S TAT JOHN FROM IAC!!) and he's sort of crazy over it... juz went to visit him at UQ 2 wks ago to check out the place... he is still super cock as ever n still making dumb n stupid comments n he still has his body odor...he failed a subject last term but he forget to take a summer course!!.. fucking stupid.. now he's going back to singapore to finish the topic in james cook uni.. damn dumb lar.. come all the way here n spent so much money n den he does a local topic in the lousiest overseas uni branch in singapore (even the real james cook uni in aussie , no one wans to go) n he gets a local degree instead of the UQ one..OMG...

a leopard will neva change its spot n a cock will always haf his birdbrain...

for those who wan to say i look like Mr Homer Simpson.. pls dont... it's too uncreative n predictable .... n yes i m a christian..

suddeny i remember the sec 1 days whereby bernard n i always chat on the phone wif code names for gers so that our parents will not find out that we are hogging the phone to chat abt gers( those were the gd old cock days..haha!!)..we replaced Florence wif
Fiorentina n in those days Fiorentina was one of the best teams in Europe wif the legend Bastistuta scoring goals for fun...so we will be going like

'' eh Ber, Batistuta scored a great goal this wk leh'' = florence did something gd that wk

''Batistuta is damn sad lar.. open goal also can miss'' = florence is damn sad

''Rui Costa gives a damn gd/bad pass to him'' = florence's gd friends did sth bad or gd to her

those are the freaking funny days!! n i seriously tot we are brilliant to tink of such things....until 1 day my dad came into the room n say in canto, '' dont bo ding wa zhou, gong niu yen ar.. better go study!!'' ( dont cook porridge wif the phone toking abt gers, u better go study!!'') haha.. n i was like........ shit!! he knew it all these while!! ... hahahaha... tinking of it makes me wanna laugh alr.... i m sure my dad confirm got do this kind of rubbish when he was young too!! or else how he noe!!!

began to like the new skin.. esp the bottom pic.. the scenery is nice! n it's in France.. n its main character is a rat!! (my zodiac sign is a rat)....the rat looks a little like me ya... ok mayb i m a little cuter... but i dont mind being tat rat

ysd i tried to change the blogskin but fail.. dunnoe why there is all sorts of error..den i gave johnny my id n password to help me haf a look at it...sent him the html file of the design den he said there is too much errors in it coz it's in html , not xml file( till now i still dont understand the difference,oh wells).. so i say nvm lor forget it.. den when i woke up this morning, THE WHOLE BLOG TURNED INTO SHREK!! N ALL TAG-BOARDS N EVERYTHING N GONE!! n i noe johnny did not save the original html file after playing the joke, i m damn pissed off!

ok end up it's a misunderstanding.. he juz wanted to change the blog skin n realli tinks shrek skin is cute(shrek is cute?)...oh well.. even it's a joke ,it juz a small thing, the most i juz redo everything else and i dunnoe why i m so pissed off... so johnny if u are reading this, i m sorry for pissing off...

reminds me of an incident last yr during the Rengget biking trip... serene was injured n i tried to help her to the boat den mr YAM YUJIAN commented tat i m taking advantage of her... haha.. ok yujian is always full of crap but huihui n serene are 2 19yr old noobies who doesnt noe n mayb they take it to heart of sth...(but seriously tinking.. who will take advantage of a ger who is filled wif blood,sweat,dirt and bicycle oil...somemore the leg is swollen like an elephant..super turn off rite?)....... den back to mainland, i offered to send serene home but huihui insisted that she tags along, tinking i will do sth to serene after yam yujian again needlessly stir some shit.. send her home still got kp...i m super super pissed off wif those 2 gers...seriously they can jolly well take a cab home n dont dirty my car wif their sweaty ,bloody , filled wif bicycle oil bodies.. but serene juz lives 1 min drive from my hse and not sending her home is seriously too ungentlemanly and so i insisted on it... n after tat incident i m pissed off wif them for mths until i got to noe them betta n realise they are realli juz 2 extremely blur cock queens n all this is juz a misunderstanding and they dont mean it...

well.. life's full of misunderstandings!!! it's up to u to noe things betta n not die tinking of the wrong things n pissed off wif the wrong ppl..

tat dutch maid told me she's not veri keen abt it... ok lar... i more or less expected it... she's gng for a vietnam mt climbing dec!! cool... not a bad thing to do either... but i m still kinda keen to go europe... esp back to Swiss... the last time i went is in the summer and my aunt told me in winter swiss is extremely beautiful and totally different experience from summer... the scenery will be like those in fairy tales( erm... doesnt all fairy tales happen in spring or summer?)..

summer in swiss is damn memorable... In Geneva, lambos n ferarris are everywhere.. they say the buildings at the french part of swiss is romantic and the ppl are nice... the german part of swiss , the buildings are fierce n ppl are not so friendly but they speak english..... the italian part , the buildings are filled wif passion n the ppl are beautiful than the rest...n IT's TRUE... dunno how to describe it ... haf to see to believe it.. i remember a ger in the train.. she's from the french part of swiss(on a mt somemore) but lives in the german part now... she has a korean bf which she knew when they both went ireland to learn english... freaking cool rite... gng to another country to learn a language unlike us singaporeans who the most go down to orchard for a language class...

so i bo liao bo liao go google for such programs... n i found tat it's not tat exp!! gng to Nice to learn french is juz 400 sing per wk( abt 58 per day)... wif meals, accommodation and also daily french lessons included!! not tat bad eh...after dat still can go n visit my aunt at Hermance and also to Geneva !!so the total cost of 4 wks there shd be 400x2(2wks of french) + 1100 for air tic+ approx 1000 for 2 more wks =2900 for 4 wks in europe!! n 1000 for for 2 wks is juz entirely spent on gd food n transport(since housing is free)...n u learn a romantic language in the process... how cool is tat for a deal?! anyone interested,tell me...

my aunt replied my email alr!.. she says feel free to stay at her place in France and she has a studio apartment in swiss so if i wan, she could pass me the keys anytime!!! WOO HOO... this is sooo unexpected tat she has another house in swiss.. but dunnoe still proceeding wif the europe trip at the end of the yr not... i found a website tat can exactly plan all the roads for u in europe so driving ard shd not be a prob n everywhere in holland n belgium speaks english too... NOW the onli thing is our beloved DUTCH MAID!! ... dunnoe she still wan not... mayb she wans to spend the dec holis wif her Junyi...she doesnt sound veri enthu when i asked her the last time...

aiya if cannot, mayb i sign up for the round-the-world trip .. cost abt 2k sing onli and can travel to US , asia, northern europe, western europe n central asia, consist of abt 7 countries... n mayb go costa rica in jan for vol. work in jan... BUT spend 5k on vol work abit dumb rite??!!! dunnoe why the school charge soooo much for all these vol shit... wah lan... if wanna go realli haf to work next sem liao

do u wan to be a mole?

read up abt integumentary system todae...reminds me abt my mole near my eight eye.. it's juz a bloody small mole, doubt anyone will notice it... my parents actually did fortune telling when i was a little baby.. tat mole at tat position is called a ''se zi''. the fortune teller says i will be born rich and smart, earn lots of money and lots of nu ren yuan but will always remain poor coz my money will all get cheated by women or spent on women...cock story rite??!! ...ok it actually haf some truth in it... my dad wasn't doing veri well in biz until i was born and suddenly he did veri veri well in his biz n we moved from a 3 rm hdb flat to a bungalow.. n since i was young i did pretty well in studies and probably the best grades among my cousins( not tat i m extremely smart,it juz tat ...erm....they haf other talents)... n wif the optometry degree n taking over my dad's biz probably wont make me poor in the near future...so yes..u can say the first part haf came true!! haha.. mayb tat's the reason my dad always warn me abt women if i venture in biz and told me all the stories of his friends kanna bankrupt coz of them..

BUT SERIOUSLY!! moles are juz some dumb overgrown melanin-forming cells tat every human haf!! n some ppl haf as many as 20 or more!! so if one guy has 100 moles, he would haf millions n millions of destiny!! n if the fortune teller can actually predict which one of the millions of destiny is true, he most prob wont be a fortune teller... SO NO I dont believe in it!!

BTW if ever a guy says he will love u wif all his heart, TELL HIM to fuck off! coz he is bloody lying.. heart is juz a dumb organ tat pumps blood n wat's inside is juz some ligaments n blood vessels...haha...; if a guy says he will love u wif all his brain, tell him to FUCK OFF TOO!! coz he is bloody unromantic n he is juz a dumb ass filled wif some boring medical knowledge....the best is to say '' i will love u wif all my penis..'' it's true(u can MAKE LOVE wif the penis) and it sounds amorous ...haha.. ok.. i m lame..i noe... juz got too bored wif all these toopid anatomy studys!!

Phua Chu Kang ( PCK ) explaining sex to Chu Beng's son, Aloysius ...

Aloy : Why is making love so enjoyable ?
PCK : Aiyah, ah boy, enjoyable becaws,
same like when you dig your nose
with your finger mah !
---------------------------------------
Aloy : Do you think women enjoy sex
more
than men?
PCK : Of course woman lah ! When you
dig
dig your nose, your nose feel
better than your finger, right ?
---------------------------------------

Aloy : Why do women hate it when they
get raped ?
PCK : Ai-yah ! Say, you walk along the
load(road),den someone come over
and dig your nose, you like or
not ? Ehhh ? Don't pray pray ah
---------------------------------------
---------------------------------------
------------
Aloy : Why is it a woman cannot have
sex
when she is having her menses?
PCK : Oy !! If your nose bleeding, you
still go and dig meh?? Siow ah !Use
your Blain(brain), use your
blainnn ..........
---------------------------------------

Aloy : Why is it most men don't like
wearing condoms when they are making
love?
PCK : Ehhhh, when you dig your nose ah,
you like to dig with a glove
on your finger or not ? Not
the same shiok feeling mah. Corlight
(correct) or not?
---------------------------------------

Aloy : Why is making love carried out
in
private ?
PCK : Ah boyyyyy, use your blain, use
your blainnnnn . you go and dig your
nose in flont of your whole
class izit ?? Stupid lah!!
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Aloy : Wah ...... Uncle Chu Kang, you
are very good.
PCK : Aiyah ...... best in Singapore
and
JB, and some say Batam also ah !!!

it has been 6 days!!! n my nose is still running ... at the rate it is running, it shd be reaching bedok 85 eating ba chor mee soon... for all the folks out there living in bedok n tampines, pls dont be alarmed to see a nose running around... it's juz my innocent cute cute nose who has been working so hard for the last 6 days...Nose ,when u come back, pls help me da pao 1 packet... from the left store one ,i want mee kia, not mee pok and extra liver pls... thanx

read abt the vagina todae!! n u guys noe wat... vagina is acidic!! it's poisonous and the rumors of hafing too much sex ur penis will rot is ACTUALLY TRUE!!!.... ok i m juz kidding... haha... ur penis will produce some alkaline substance to neutralise the acids....wif the alkaline levels and the high amount of proteins, semen do actually tastes like milk!! ever wonder why a penis is shaped like a cow's glands that produce milk? ahha... GOD IS AMAZING>>>

i noticed many ppl on my msn changes their nicks to '' what's love?'' or ''love is...blah blah blah''... does the long holis make ppl qn love or make them feel empty n feel that the one that they love now may not be the one they want...

remembering this article i read in some random mag in borders when i was in NS... it has a deep impression on me even though it haf been yrs... it is something to do wif ''trial relationship''.. trial relationships are relationships tat started wif a ''try try' attitude... like when a nice guy likes u, though u dont haf much feelings for tat guy but dont mind trying out; or a decent-looking n nice ger likes u , n u dont mind trying out wif her... i m sure many haf been through or heard of this kind of things..

it states that the success rate of this kind of relationship is pretty high in the female side. the guy side i cant remember if it's low or normal... success in this case means from little or no feeling to a lot of feeling for the interested party. the reason is when we actually treating someone as ur gf/bf, ur brain will actually send signals to ''like'' tat person...n of course they fulfill some of the needs(like companionship, sex, family and peer pressure,yada yada yada )n given time n no major hiccups(which makes sense coz if they like u , they most prob wont argue wif u in the first few wks or mths), feelings will develop and u will actually ''like'' tat person...it is esp evident in females(maybe they are more sensitive?)...so it argues if the feeling is real, since it can be manufactured? n debates the success of match-making...if tat's the case, if u treat a dog as ur bf, will u actually love the dog?( bad sex aside)...haha..

the gers who came out of the relationship during the time of the study says that they found out that the guy is who they dont realli want .. can u love a person but u noe that he or she is not the one u want?? sounds complicated but i m sure many who are in love before noe what i mean... but for me, it's pretty simple... if i can imagine myself being wif a ger for a long long time to come(n i realli meant LONG LONG TIME) n willing to forgo the chances during that period to b wif other gers, she's the one i will go after...

i wanted to read more abt the article n tried googling ''trial relationship'' but it came up 3.9 million results!!! believing the article or not is up to u guys....

i m sick ,veri sick... n thanx to their incapable and slow and fucked up doctors here, i m continuing to be sick... fever, cough, running nose, headache and sore throat... i cant even tink properly now... like my thinking is being crippled and cant study any shit....n bed now is my new found sex mate.... i literally slept wif it the WHOLE DAY!!!.. n my exams are next wk...

getting quite excited tat i m coming back on 26th!! less than a mth away... the first things i will eat is ba chor mee and lor mee and a steamed chang yu canto style.... ok too sick n tired to blog more...
back to my sex mate.. bye

VIET, LAOS, MYanmar

i haf officially bked my tix to viet on 30 june... woo hoo...!! backpacking to laos , myanmar is one of the things i HAF to do before i get old... these kind of wulu wulu places are sooooo exciting... more exciting than going japan or hk for shopping..all these can be done in my older yrs... weiping gave me a choice of route... from viet right up to china or viet to laos den to myanmar... of course i choose the laos option!! great... it's damn exciting.... i haven bked the return tic BTW so seriously i dont noe when or where i m getting back from... which is COOL.. uncertainty and freedom to return at any time to anywhere makes this trip even more exciting...

i juz realized that wif ,jess, sylvester, kaeley gone, there are no more MJ!!! shit!! .. JASLYN.!!!! as the president of SSA u shd recruit more MJ khakis and it's ur duty to relive the MJ spirit in all singaporeans..haha...the future of singaporean MJ spirit is in ur hands now!! dont let the mahjong GOD down!!

DRaCULAS

the coffin desert!!

Stayed at GOlD coast for the last few days!! WWOHOOOO ... great times there...

first we start off friday's nite by going Dracula's to celebrate Jess' bday..it's a themed restaurant onli available in GC n Melbourne....the whole restaurant is like a mansion and all the waitress and waiters are dressed in those weird costumes...we get to sit a mini roller coaster wif all the scary vampires in the place... den we are invited to a 4 hrs show!!... great performance by the ppl and super funny wif those anti-NZ jokes and lots of funny sex jokes..

DEN surprise!!! a cake popped out of nowhere for jess and she was shocked... BUT the cock thing is THE NAME IS WRONG!!! how cock can it be... hahaha... den the waiter apologises and give us the cake for free...

later on we proceed to jesslyn, slyvester and karley's apartment ... supposingly i wanted to go back brisbane but i cant be bothered to travel back here the next day for a dinner wif the SSA ...
DEN played MAHJONG!!! WOOO... the first mj session overseas ... though they are playing 10 cents per tai but i dun mind at all... able to mo the tiles made me feel shiok ... somemore i could finally tok singlish .. makes me feel super at home...but i feel super sick at the middle of it... sore throat, headache and running nose all came...but who cares!!! mj is more impt..

the next morning we woke up at 2pm and we had to rush to the marketplace to do some shopping .. shop abit den we went to the pacific fair , one of the largest shopping center in GC... nothing much there seriously n the stuff is extremely exp..

HERe comes the Dinner...!! i was hoping to noe some hot singaporeans there but THERE IS NONE AGAIN!! probably onli Ray(guy's name again) who was a lesbian...what's wrong wif hot gers in brisbane...??!!! DO they HAF to be lesbians to be hot?!!

n oh yar.. Karley is engaged!! great!! i can feel a wedding is near... i told her she muz die die invite me to her wedding or i will burn her hse down..haha..